32-year-old man berates his parents for having him when they were 44 and never giving him a sibling: 'He’s a spoiled brat who doesn’t work and lives with his girlfriend'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Oct 15, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

You can't be angry at your parents forever. At some point, you either need to accept that they made mistakes and move on, or cut them out of your life because the things they did to you as a child were too bad for forgiveness. Both are totally valid options, and it's okay to take some time to process exactly what you should do when your parents' behavior genuinely does negatively affect your life into adulthood. But you can't be in that limbo forever.

If you are still blaming your parents for your shortcomings when you're in your 30s and 40s, you need to take initiative, go to therapy, and heal, because otherwise you're going to be an old person still complaining about how your mom is the reason you're not where you want to be in life years after she's long gone.

There are some life circumstances that you can't totally control, like how old your parents were when they had you and how many siblings you had. Those are the kinds of things you need to accept by the time you're a grown-up, because there's nothing that can be done to change them.

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  • Portrait of a balding man with a beard and glasses
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  • The mom in this story is sick of her son continually complaining about the fact that he has old parents who didn't give him a sibling. Those are the kinds of complaints you'd expect a lonely child to make, but this guy is 32 and still hasn't moved on from this banal childhood trauma.

  • My adult son, 32, hates my husband and I.

    My husband and I have come to the realization that our adult son despises us for having him late. We tried to give him a good life but he's a spoiled brat who doesn't work and lives with his girlfriend. And just recently, he has come to the conclusion that his life is terrible because we didn't give him a sibling. He says
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  • that it made him feel lonely a lot and didn't help him develop. And to top it off, he hates that we had him in our 40s. I will admit, my husband and I had him when we were 44. His reasoning is that he was the only kid in school with old parents and that it looked " weird. "And how we can never relate to him.
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  • Happy couple Caucasian seniors relaxing reading newspaper in living room
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  • But for most of his adult life, he has brought that up and used it against us. He says he's the only one of any group that has " old parents" and that we don't realize the implications it has had him on. He made it seem like he has dealt with constant comments from kids his whole life. There is nothing we can do about that.
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  • He goes on about how it will hard for him to take care of us because he doesn't have a sibling to share us with. And that he is all alone in the end. I tried to tell him that just because he has a sibling doesn't mean that everyone will get along. I didn't get along with my brother for the majority of my life.
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  • My husband is also an only child and has no close relatives that he is in contact with. So he doesn't know his father's side of the family. Which he has attacked verbally about too.
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  • Frankly, we are fed up and not sure how much more we can take due to our health. We know he hates us.
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  • LionFyre13G I mean it just sounds like he's afraid of ending up alone. You're older and he has no siblings. And you're not close to the little extended family you do have. He probably has anxiety of what his life will look like after you pass, which might be sooner for him than most of the people he knows. He probably doesn't want to tell you he's scared about the decades he'll likely have left after you're both gone.
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  • Maricellabella He's also the only one responsible for both of their geriatric care. Either financially, legally, or personally. Most likely all three unless OP is rich. His peers wont experience this burden for decades, meanwhile in his 30s his parents are in their 70s. Officially in the final developmental stages of life.
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  • Fair-Trade35 At 32 your son sounds like a child
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  • Guilty_Pie_3698 OP I think he has become very jealous of others. A lot of his friends and girlfriends have these big families. He's usually alone. But his father and I believe he is too obsessed with us and needs to grow up.
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  • Plushie_Hoarder As someone who's the oldest of 7... even if you had this mystical sibling for him, chances are he'd be just as socially stunted. As mentioned, oldest of 7, and I'm anxious, antisocial, and a bit neurotic (working on it lol)
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  • and I had my first sibling born when I was 4 and my youngest born when I was 16. Having siblings doesn't increase your social skills or abilities, having old parents doesn't either. I had young parents and literally I can count on one hand the amount of times it was relevant. Your son is just ungrateful.
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  • RecipeAtTheTop Ultimately, your child is an adult now. He needs to take responsibility for himself and his own life. Blaming you will get him nowhere. You might see if he is interested in family therapy if you want to get to the bottom of why he feels that way.
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  • mrnestor I am sorry to hear that. Could it be that your son is not in a good spot right now and everything is coming out ? Or is this something you have worked out for your entire life? Sometimes, we blame others because we are unable to truly feel ourselves. We project our pain onto other people and most of the times is the people we love the most, family and friends. Maybe there is a solution to this and hope that you stay healthy! Good luck :)
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  • MaybeHughes Just so you know, people of your son's generation (me, and many reading this post) see indicating language in posts like this that hint that there's more to the story. For example, your generation uses the expression "spoiled brat" in a way that's meant to be shorthand for "his complaints are trivial and invalid" but to our generation, "spoiled brat" is more likely to indicate to us that you are dismissive, not that necessarily that he's worthy of being dismissed. It makes us more cu
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  • Secondly, in a comment you describe his "whining." This is also, in many ways, a generation-locked phrase that feels fishy. So I'm not saying who is right and who is wrong, but I'm inviting you to reflect on what emotions you're feeling that would drive you to characterize him that way, and instead to choose mindfulness in those moments, a willingness to believe that you're not understanding clearly.
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  • Bargle-Nawdle-Zouss Why is he spoiled? How did that happen?
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  • haventsleptforyears Sounds like he's had life pretty easy if this is what he thinks is "traumatic" and an excuse to live life as a loser. Many of us had parents that range from 20 to 35 yrs older, with siblings, and still led a lonely life. Also sounds like he's not good at making friends.
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  • Chemical_Statement12 It looks like he was spoiled and taught only to receive, but not to give and to work for something. Overindulgind someone is not a good parenting strategy. It stunts the soul of a child. I would pray for his soul and cut any financial aid for him. Hopefully you have enough financial security to arrange things for your winter days.
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  • Guilty_Pie_3698 OP We are well taken care of and retired. He is also personally well taken care of as he is good with money and doesn't need us.
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30s family drama only child mother siblings old parents parenting dad old people entitled family sibling mom son parents entitled people Father
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